Aren’t we all the same?

I have always believed that we all are similar.  Everyone of us, while unique in our own ways, match each others actions in certain situations.  Sure, we may have a different hair or eye color.  Some of us may speak different languages.  Some people grow up wealthy and some grow up in poverty.  These things make us different, but aren’t we really all just the same?

Every person I have ever met has cried, this shows me that we all hurt.  All of us have laughed or smiled, revealing that we like to be happy.  We all fall in love, showing our desire to be close to another person.  We all share the same basic emotions.  These are universal.  We all use them differently, but we use them none the less.  What gives us a unique personality is the type of surroundings we grew up around and how we reacted to the emotions given to us from that foundation.  A child who has parents who were both athletes is likely to follow the same course.  A child who grew up in poverty has a much higher likely hood of living in poverty as well.  It all falls back on the way the child was raised.

What makes you who you are is not the environment you grew up in.  That is simply what helped you find yourself in the environment you are in today.  You are not the surroundings you grew up around, you are the person who reacted to those surroundings.  How does the life you have lived affect who you are?  Are you a better or worse person because of the way you grew up?  I don’t necessarily believe so.  I would like to challenge that mind set.

A goal driven person will find ways to reach their destination regardless of circumstance.  It is in their nature.  This is why you see some people come from a very poor family, but find ways to succeed and become wealthy.  While the case is rare, it does happen.  We also see celebrities, who came from well known families, make major mistakes.  You determine your course, not the influences of nature around you.  Only you can decide how to react to each obstacle in life.  This is what determines who you are as a person.

We should probably learn to overlook a person’s social status when deciding how we feel about them.  We should take into account where they come from and what brought them to where they are the same way we consider them as they are.  If we could peel back the shell of who we are we would find that we all have similar traits.  We all want the best for ourselves and our families.  We want to succeed.  We all want to be happy.  We all like to laugh.  None of us want to hurt.  None of us want pain.  We don’t really want to be alone. . . Not forever anyway.

I say everything I just said to try to point out that the person you judge walking by for the way they look or the way they act, that person could be you.  If you had only grown up in their environment, you may be their twin.  I think we could all look at ourselves and find success and failure in our lives.  I think we can all also look at ourselves and say we are proud of who we are.  Many may disagree here, but don’t be too quick on this.  I don’t believe anyone wants failure.  Because of this we all try.  We do the best we can with the best way we know how to do it.  Sometimes it just takes a little push from an outside source to teach us to do a little more.  Or maybe we need a little more motivation from somewhere, anywhere, but we still know everyone wants to succeed.  We all just haven’t had the same push.

I guess all I am asking from all of this is when you look at someone else, don’t judge them.  They grew up different than you.  The person you are looking at is not the drug dealer or the prostitute, the beggar or the “dirty” person you pass by on occasion.  This is just the environment they live in.  The real person is inside.  The person who hurts, cries, laughs, smiles and wants to be loved.  This is the real person.  Rather than judging their situation, help them out of it.  Share your successes and ideas that have helped you along the way.  You had help.  Somewhere along the line, the helpless lonely person, that is you, was given help that got you to where you are.  These people could be there too, they just haven’t had the help.  We all do it the best way we know how.  They just don’t know how.  You may think it is easy, but for them it is not.  Don’t be too hard on them though, you could have grown up in that environment.  It could have been you.  They aren’t where we are, just like we aren’t where some others are.  None of us are without flaw.  Why?  Because I believe we truly are all the same.

Beating the Storm…

I spent some time with my girlfriend in Charleston this weekend and had an amazing time helping her do some shopping and just spending one-on-one time together.  I must say it was probably one of the best weekends ever.  While in Charleston, I received some reports of bad weather that was going to be heading in and was informed it may be in my best interest to head back home early.  Obviously, no one wants a perfect weekend to end for any reason, but I decided it may be best to pack it up and come home soon.  After carefully considering weather reports, I decided I would stay, but come home early this morning to beat the weather that looked like it would hit around noon. This morning I headed home trying to beat a storm that to this moment, 11:30 p.m., hasn’t really hit hard yet.  I wonder where is this storm?

It is kind of funny how a report can change the course of a weekend.  I mean, I guess I was going to be coming home soon anyway, but I left extra early to beat a storm that I didn’t have to really try to outrun.  It didn’t come at that time.  I wonder how many other courses in our lives we alter due to a circumstance we can see in the future that may not have ever happened in the first place.

Some people fight because they believe something is true that has not or will not happen.  Some people end relationships based on a rumor.  Some may marry thinking another means it when they say, “I do take you now and forever.”  We never know what the future holds, but sometimes we act according to what we feel may happen.  Is this the smartest thing?  I tend to move a little slower.  I want to believe that I do not know the answers and I need the time to step back and see what is true and what is not.  We should all be careful not to race to a place based on reports of a storm.  We need to prepare for the storm, but not alter our course because of it.

I have dealt with many storms in my life.  Sometimes it seems I have faced enough to last a lifetime, and the rest of my days should play out with peace and joy filling my every moment.  This will not be the case.  All of our lives are filled with turmoil.  We all face struggles in our every day lives that we need to be careful not to run from, but to face them head on. We need to allow them to shape us in to who we are.  We should not fear the storm, but prepare for it.  By doing so, we have beaten the storm.  We may not have out raced it, but we beat it.  Beat the storm.  Don’t let it alter your course in life.